Here are Alejandra’s tips on how to self parent when you feel vulnerable.

1. Body contact

Give yourself a hug, hold yourself firmly, rub your arms and body.
Give yourself loving touch, caressing your face and hair.


2. Soothing your heart

Put your hand on your heart, rub your heart and speak kind words to your heart.
“I love you, you matter, I trust your wisdom, I’m sorry I haven’t known how to hear you before and I’m here now.”


3. Ask yourself what you need

“What do I need right now? How can I care for myself?”
“Who can I trust to ask for what I need?”


4. Say loving things to yourself in regards to the situation that has triggered you.

Say the kinds of things that an unconditionally loving mother would say to her child.

For example:
If you were feeling ashamed because you thought you had done something wrong say “Everybody makes mistakes, I love you no matter what”
If you are judging yourself about how you feel say “It’s ok to feel sad about that. Not understanding why you feel a certain way doesn’t make it any less valid.”

Doing this is the practice of consciously re-training your self talk to be loving and nurturing.


Check out Byron Katie’s work for more!
When Alejandra’s inner child is freaking out she listens to her coaching her clients (either on YouTube or in her audio book ‘Loving What Is’). Hearing her voice and her wisdom feels soothing.

Image by Aleira Moon taken at our Erotic Mother day.

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