Longing and the gifts of loneliness
Do you ever feel lonely?
Loneliness can be a gift. If you listen to your feelings they have a message for you.
When you are lonely you are longing for something and focusing on how you don’t have it. You might event think you can’t have it or are never going to get it.
Longing is your desire….for whatever it is you are wanting. It’s the feeling of wanting.
A while ago my body was feeling really lonely, literally aching with loneliness. I explored this feeling and asked what it was telling me. I wanted to be touched.
It had been more than a week since I’d seen anyone and I hadn’t received touch from anyone but myself in that time.
Loneliness was my bodies way of telling me what I needed.
Our feeling has a deep wisdom when we really feel and listen to them.
Instead of fighting the loneliness I softened and allowed myself to feel it. It turned into a blissful longing and I started really loving what I was feeling instead of wanting it to go away.
Is there a feeling you have that you don’t want to feel?
All our feelings have a purpose. Resisting them blocks us from receiving the message our feelings want us to hear and keeps us stuck in them.
Experiment with softening into the feeling, explore it, see where it’s coming from and what it’s saying to you.
Two things that will support you to explore the message your feelings want you to hear:
1. Free writing (allowing words to flow without censoring them) is amazing to get all the stuff in your head out.
2. Move your body (especially if you feel really stuck).
When our body is physically frozen the rest of us freezes with it. Movement and dance help free up the parts that are trapped. Allowing our bodies to move freely (as in not in choreographed or structured movements) is deeply healing. The amount of shit that can get expressed and cleared up through movement is incredible.
Image by James Looker taken at our DE photoshoot.